I had to go, show the newbies how it's really done:
|Maxi, £7 in H&M|
Hair flower/brooches, £1 each in New Look
Monkey clip-on-hugger, stylist's own.
|Up close it's a bit 'Keeping Up Appearances'- but it works|
on the whole maxi.
I seem to have gone mad for maxis of late. I know shortarses aren't supposed to wear them blah blah, boring fashion advice blah... what do they think wedges were invented for? This next one is Indian-inspired- on the dummy it looked classy and luxurious, but on me looks deliciously 'Northern girl clubbing' mwhahaha. I am becoming increasingly drawn to this look as a way of being a little bit bling whilst keeping excess flesh covered up. Appropriate, but reassuringly non-classy. Now, Jeeves, fetch one the Fake Bake and the big, big hair rollers...
|£15 in Krisp. Clip On Monkey despairs. Husband asked |
if this is for trips up to his homeland (AKA: North Of Watford).
|Even I concede that a necklace with this|
might be 'too much'.
|What you can't see it the high lycra content.|
|More cleavage, vicar?|
Finally, I snapped up this Pocahontas-style smock top from River Island. The cheeky bloke behind the till looked me up and down and said 'you do know it's a size 8?'. Erm yes, just because I'm older than most people in here doesn't automatically change my clothes size, young man, and by the way your trousers appear to be falling down and exposing your arse...
And just to prove it fits, a photo of me larking around doing a faux-Hello!-shoot at the Museum of 51 on the South Bank. In a room my twin sister described at 'Perdita Heaven', and she was right. I've colourised it slightly to help you normal folk see the world through my eyes:
So, have you found any bargains recently? Are you saving your pennies wisely, or dipping your toe into the messy, messy world of the sale rails...? Any top tips for bargains, share 'em below!